Nailed the Interview!

Executive Summary: Today, I went to a job interview at an organization that helps children. I nailed the interview.

Read no further unless you want to hear me brag about how great my interviewing skills are.

They had a group interview “to save time.”

“Great,” I thought, “I’m all ready a stressed and nervous person. Nothing like a little competition to make me completely crumble.”

How wrong I was. The interview actually boosted my confidence. For one thing, i have been working on my competition skills. I do think that competition sucks. I hate competitive people because they are not nice. Given the choice between kindness and acting like a jerk, competitive people will choose the latter. Then they’ll justify it by assuming that “everyone does it” which is nonsense.

However, I am running out of money here, and I need a job. Also, i don’t want to be a complete doormat. Surely there can be a middle way between taking the air out of people’s tires and rolling over dead at the first sight of conflict.

So I rubbed up my greasy hands and rolled up my sleeves thinking, “Competition is what you want? Competition is what you get. Game on!”

From the first question, I knew I had the interview sewed up. When they asked us our non-profit experience, I was the only one with ten years in the field. I was also the only one who had volunteered to help children. Nobody mentioned volunteering at all. Finally, I was the only one who told cute anecdotes that made them smile and nod knowingly. I am the master story teller. After all making up stories is my calling.

Some of the other candidates did do a good job. One of them knew Spanish which may clinch the job as it’s the only thing I don’t have that is required of the job. Another had a lot of computer skills, like me. She also had hospital experience and experience with confidentiality. I had that, too, but I didn’t have a chance to talk about it.

I was the first to answer most questions especially the one that nobody else was ready for, “Why should we hire you?”

Afterwards we were able to ask questions. I had ten ready, but they only had time to answer one. The only other person who asked a question asked, “Is this a non-profit?” Just give it up dude!

Unless there is something out of my control, I have this job. I think I finally found the secret HR decoder ring. I’m still going to work really hard on practicing for interviews and to applying to jobs because I need to be ready.

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